I had a conversation with my neighbor about a month ago that I have thought about a lot. She moved here from back east a few years ago. Before coming to Utah, she didn’t really know much about The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. And while she has had many positive interactions, she mentioned how surprised she has been at times by what seems to be a lack of tolerance for differences, even among family members of the same faith. Her comment to me was, “I know you have your ‘words of wisdom,’ but isn’t it better to drink a cup of coffee than to be unkind?” She is absolutely right! There is only one commandment the Savior taught us is more important than to love our neighbor and that is to love God. That is something every Christian religion teaches. Yet sadly we see too much anger and hatred in the world. Too often in society unkindness is normalized and intolerance is celebrated. Too often the second great commandment is not being lived very well at all.
To help us change this culture, Dieter F. Uchtdorf gave what he called a two-word sermon. He said, “When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following: Stop it!” Then he reminded us, “There is enough heartache and sorrow in this life without our adding to it through our own stubbornness, bitterness, and resentment.”1
If we want to be disciples of Christ, we must stop all those things! You will notice there is no conditional clause in President Uchtdorf’s words or anywhere in the scriptures that says, “unless someone is doing something hurtful to you.” Our behavior should never be conditional on how we are being treated. No matter how someone treats us, as followers of Jesus Christ, we should be more loving and forgiving, more conscientious of our words and actions. As we follow the perfect example of the Savior, we will be able to look past others’ shortcomings, turn the other cheek, give a soft answer, be a peacemaker, and love as He loved.
Dallin H. Oaks taught, “Followers of Christ should be examples of civility. We should love all people, be good listeners, and show concern for their sincere beliefs. Though we may disagree, we should not be disagreeable. Our stands and communications on controversial topics should not be contentious.”2
Russell M. Nelson once said, “Because of the long history of hostility upon the earth, many feel that peace is beyond hope. I disagree. Peace is possible. We can learn to love our fellow human beings throughout the world. … We can live together with mutual admiration and respect. … Things we have in common are greater than are our differences. Peace is a prime priority that pleads for our pursuit.”3
Imagine the good that can come if we begin in our homes to be more loving and forgiving, treating others as we want to be treated, overlooking faults and failings, speaking softly and with kindness. Then if our behavior can spill from our homes into our neighborhoods, from our neighborhoods into our communities, from our communities into our nations, our world will slowly become a more peaceful place to live.
Jeffrey R. Holland put it so eloquently, “Notwithstanding even the most terrible offenses that might come to us, we can rise above our pain only when we put our feet onto the path of true healing. That path is the forgiving one walked by Jesus of Nazareth, who calls out to each of us, ‘Come, follow me.’ In such an invitation to be His disciple and to try to do as He did, Jesus is asking us to be instruments of His grace—to be ‘ambassadors for Christ’ in ‘the ministry of reconciliation,’ as Paul described it to the Corinthians. The Healer of every wound, He who rights every wrong, asks us to labor with Him in the daunting task of peacemaking in a world that won’t find it any other way. … Be peacemakers—love peace, seek peace, create peace, cherish peace.”4
I hope we will try a little harder to love a little better. “Living that second great commandment,” President Nelson taught, “is the key to becoming a true disciple of Jesus Christ.”5
References:
1. The Merciful Obtain Mercy – Dieter F. Uchtdorf
2. Loving Others and Living With Differences – Dallin H. Oaks
3. Blessed Are the Peacemakers – Russell M. Nelson
4. The Ministry of Reconciliation – Jeffrey R. Holland
5. The Second Great Commandment – Russell M. Nelson